{"id":1999,"date":"2011-02-28T10:22:06","date_gmt":"2011-02-28T17:22:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/?p=1999"},"modified":"2011-02-28T10:22:06","modified_gmt":"2011-02-28T17:22:06","slug":"noah","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/?p=1999","title":{"rendered":"Noah"},"content":{"rendered":"

I thought this was a cute little list my more conservative\/religious relatives sent me.\u00a0 It ends with a “God fixes everything #11” which I deleted ‘cuz while I believe in a higher power I believe also that we are the power source of that higher power.\u00a0 Convoluted, I know.\u00a0 Maybe I should start a new category called “religious bullshit”\u00a0 HA!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Anyway… on to the uplifting little list.<\/strong><\/span> I added my opinions! Muahaha<\/strong><\/p>\n

Everything I need to know, I learned from Noah’s Ark .<\/strong><\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

ONE<\/strong>: \u00a0Don’t miss the boat. (Whichever boat you choose..going PC here)<\/em>
\n TWO<\/span><\/strong>: \u00a0Remember that we are all in the same boat! (or at least we’re a fleet of boats all going the same direction… maybe.. wait.. who’s got the map?)<\/em>
\n THREE<\/span><\/strong>: \u00a0Plan ahead. \u00a0It wasn’t raining when Noah built the Ark.\u00a0 (plan within limits, don’t let it ruin your enjoyment of every day.)<\/em>
\n FOUR<\/span><\/strong>: \u00a0Stay fit. \u00a0When you’re 60 years old, someone may ask you to do something really big.\u00a0 (Yup.. done.\u00a0 OK, doing.. sheesh!)<\/em>
\nFIVE<\/span><\/strong>: \u00a0Don’t listen to critics; just get on with the job that needs to be done.\u00a0 (my personal 2011 motto)<\/em>
\nSIX:<\/span><\/strong> Build your future on high ground.\u00a0 (hmmm.. define “high” \ud83d\ude42 <\/em>
\nSEVEN<\/span><\/strong>: \u00a0For safety’s sake, travel in pairs.\u00a0 (at a minimum!! muahaha)<\/em>
\nEIGHT<\/span><\/strong>: \u00a0Speed isn’t always an advantage. \u00a0The snails were on board with the cheetahs.\u00a0 (the ability for multi-speeds is always a plus.. wait, when did this degenerate into naughtiness.\u00a0 oh, right.. I’M talking.)<\/em>
\nNINE<\/span><\/strong>: \u00a0When you’re stressed, float awhile.\u00a0 (In SoCal we call that meditating, I call it vegging out in front of the t.v.)<\/em>
\nTEN<\/span><\/strong>: \u00a0Remember, the Ark was built by amateurs; the Titanic by professionals. (More than that!\u00a0 I bet it the Titanic was built by committees!)<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I thought this was a cute little list my more conservative\/religious relatives sent me.\u00a0 It ends with a “God fixes everything #11” which I deleted ‘cuz while I believe in a higher power I believe also that we are the … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1999","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-twirling-my-skirt"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1999","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1999"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1999\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3206,"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1999\/revisions\/3206"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1999"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1999"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1999"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}