{"id":373,"date":"2009-07-16T10:24:16","date_gmt":"2009-07-16T17:24:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/?p=373"},"modified":"2025-11-08T09:27:41","modified_gmt":"2025-11-08T16:27:41","slug":"club-med","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/?p=373","title":{"rendered":"Club Med"},"content":{"rendered":"

About 20 (yes, 20) years ago my mother sprang for a trip for me, her and my sister to go on vacation.\u00a0 She wanted to take us all before we started marrying because she knew she couldn’t afford spouses on these trips.\u00a0 (My brother was engaged so he was the reason for her idea and ironically he didn’t get to go because he got severely burned and had to keep his fresh skin completely out of the sun.\u00a0 No tropics for him!)<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

So she booked the three of us on a vacation to Club Med in the beautiful Caribbean islands of Turkes and Caicos, specifically the little island of Turquoise (pronounce with the flair of a Frenchman as Turkwah).\u00a0 She chose that because you could get Scuba certified there and she wanted to do that.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

The rooms were paired so I happily got a roommate.\u00a0 A young girl who joined us at dinner sometimes but we rarely saw her.\u00a0 The weather was wonderful.\u00a0 Huge turquoise clouds roamed the sky and they would randomly dump bathwater rain for 10 to 20 minutes, drenching everything on a sunny day.\u00a0 It was spectacular.\u00a0 <\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

We arrive on a Sunday to stay a week to leave next Sunday.\u00a0 But other groups would arrive on a Thursday or a Friday and stay a week or just 5 or 3 days.\u00a0 So there seemed to be new people there all the time.\u00a0 They had night shows that were like mini Cirque de Solei things.\u00a0 They had a disco… yes people it was a disco, this WAS 20 years ago.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

The food, Oh my sweet taste buds, the food was incredible.\u00a0 I’d never liked fish.\u00a0 Because of the way my mother cooked it I just assumed I didn’t like fish.\u00a0 When you try an expertly cooked, fresh caught, that morning, off that coast, piece of fish… well you rediscover the joy of eating.\u00a0 I had fish every night for dinner, a huge breakfast &\u00a0lunch and there were bottles of wine at every table, every night.\u00a0\u00a0 But that was 20 years ago…I could eat like that then!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

\"The<\/strong><\/span>

The "Joy" of Scuba<\/p><\/div>\n

First day we signed up for Scuba lessons.\u00a0 And I quickly learned that THIS little fire sign Aries was never meant to completely submerge herself in water like that.\u00a0 Ever!\u00a0 Went through the instruction… practiced with the gear… trudged the 1,000 lb thing on my back into the water… tried unsuccessfully to convince my\u00a0brain to breath under water 3 times… and trudged back up making baseball signals to “bunt…punt…whatever, end of game!”\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

So off to silk painting I went.\u00a0 Very relaxing.\u00a0 Everything you did at Club Med, you did mostly in a bathing suit so having a bit of self expression on a length of sink to wrap around yourself was nice.\u00a0 I made earrings.\u00a0 I still have both pieces.\u00a0\u00a0 And I drank.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Oh, yea!\u00a0\u00a0 You’d start with the wine and dinner.\u00a0 Then move into something for the show or dancing.\u00a0 By Thursday we had signed up for the Party Boat ride.\u00a0 Oh boy did I have fun.\u00a0\u00a0 A large group of guys and girls boarded a boat where we motored to the equivalent of a huge sandbar about 30 to 45 minutes away.\u00a0 <\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

\"Our<\/strong><\/span>

Our "Entertainment" Director<\/p><\/div>\n

There we played drinking games in the sand for about 3 hours.\u00a0 I think there was food… I just don’t remember.\u00a0 Because all the drinking games involved this lovely tasting very alcoholic punch.\u00a0 And it was hot and we played a lot of them.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

The funniest game was called “San Francisco, New York.”\u00a0 Oh God I laugh just thinking about it.\u00a0 Our Ringmaster, some foreign, gorgeously built, blond God (who even I knew better than to sleep with because you knew he was sleeping with EVERYONE.)<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

\"club-med_0003\"Anyway…he had us all lie down on\u00a0our backs in a row, guy…girl…guy…girl.\u00a0\u00a0 And we have to lie really close together.\u00a0 Then the person\u00a0at one end, who was a guy, rolls over onto the person next to them.\u00a0 Now he is face down on top of the opposite sex.\u00a0 This is\u00a0New\u00a0York.\u00a0 Then that same person continues the\u00a0roll onto the next person.\u00a0 Now he’s back to front with the same sex.\u00a0 THIS is San Francisco!\u00a0\u00a0 OMG… it’s not only the funniest thing to participate in it’s just hysterical to watch the guys linger in New York and try to quickly pass through San Francisco!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Last game we played was choose a partner of the opposite sex, go into the waves and switch bathing suits.\u00a0 My mother dashed in with our underwater camera.\u00a0 My sister at that point left the games, sat on the party boat and pretty much didn’t speak to me for the rest of the trip (I mean until Sunday!)\u00a0 Because, hell, I jumped right on it!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

So us girls are romping around topless while these guys are in our bikinis and we’re all so drunk.\u00a0 I think at one point someone poured beer or punch all over my chest.\u00a0 I do remember it being very “refreshing.”\u00a0\u00a0 We all changed back, maybe that’s when they gave us lunch.\u00a0 But we got on the boat and that’s when I discovered my “cure” for seasickness!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

When we docked, and after I heaved over the side, my ‘cure’ and I dashed (and I mean we ran) to his room and had about 4-5 hours of sex.\u00a0 Of course you have to include the rest time and shower time involved…so it wasn’t 4-5 hours of STRAIGHT sex.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Then dinner that night and after my drunken crew went into heavy overtime with wine drinking games and ice cubes at the table.\u00a0 A lot of laughing and a lot of fun.\u00a0 And no, I don’t remember where my sister was, but my mom was right there.\u00a0 Probably thought she was chaperoning me!\u00a0\u00a0 After dinner we danced until 1 in the AM and I staggered off to my room.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

I woke up without a hangover, my personal gift from God (might be the Scot in me) and I got out of bed and fell straight to the floor.\u00a0 My knee… blown.\u00a0\u00a0 And there is really no way to know when I’d initially damaged it because I had kept myself completely anesthetized the entire day!\u00a0\u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

My mother the Nurse Practitioner (in Peds though) and the EMT who happened to also be at Club Med… he was cute, but I was benched!… they both felt I’d torn ligaments or tendons or something.\u00a0 Ice, elevation and Margaritas were prescribed and I delved into Michener’s Caribbean for the better part of 2 days.\u00a0 I did manage to “enjoy” one other male because the swelling had gone down and you don’t need your knees for the positions we used!\u00a0 <\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

And my sister was already not talking to me anyway!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

About 20 (yes, 20) years ago my mother sprang for a trip for me, her and my sister to go on vacation.\u00a0 She wanted to take us all before we started marrying because she knew she couldn’t afford spouses on … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-373","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-the-joy-of-family"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/373","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=373"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/373\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5167,"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/373\/revisions\/5167"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=373"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=373"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=373"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}