{"id":1054,"date":"2010-04-05T09:03:27","date_gmt":"2010-04-05T16:03:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/?p=1054"},"modified":"2025-11-04T10:57:54","modified_gmt":"2025-11-04T17:57:54","slug":"me-and-europe","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/?p=1054","title":{"rendered":"Me and Europe"},"content":{"rendered":"

In my life I’ve done a bit of traveling.\u00a0 When I was 5 and my brother was 3 & a half my mother had the opportunity to go to Sweden.\u00a0 I think she was even pregnant with my little sister at the time.\u00a0 Anyway she took that opportunity, and us, on the long air flight to Sweden. <\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

We were in coach and she tells the story of the crazy kids running up and down the aisle.\u00a0 The stewardess (hey!\u00a0 That’s what they were called back then and I’m sticking to the period!) anyway the stewardess asks my mother to “please control your children”.\u00a0 My mother points to us, sitting quietly coloring (angels in childhood, hellions in adulthood!)\u00a0 and explains “these are her children”.\u00a0 Turns out those kid’s mother was in first class, snookered and she’d booked her kids in coach!\u00a0 Totally inappropriate and in a perverse way I admire it!!
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All I remember of Sweden was the amazingly huge marble staircase that spiraled up and around the elevator.\u00a0 Oh and that elevator!\u00a0 I remember the cool way the elevator doors closed with a metal gate and a window in the doors so you could see the floors as they passed.\u00a0 To a 5 year old it was wonderful.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

I did manage to go to Canada when I was 9 and then again when I was 16.. but does that really count?\u00a0 Well the 9 year old story does.. I’ll tell that later.\u00a0 So the next big trip opportunity was when I was 23.\u00a0 My mother went on a lecture tour of Europe.\u00a0 5 countries, I don’t know how many cities in a 3 week span. <\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

We were complete newbies to a European lecture tour and my mother over-speculated our needs and we ended up taking 9 bags.\u00a0 That’s right.. 2 women with 9 bags!\u00a0 1 bag held the master tapes, so they had to be hand inspected at every airport.\u00a0 We’d taken then in case we found someone who wanted to duplicate our vhs videos!\u00a0 Did I mention this was in the 80’s!\u00a0 1.5 bags each of clothing and the rest of the bags was all product to sell at each lecture where my mother was speaking.
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So I’ve seen Paris.\u00a0 Not impressed.\u00a0\u00a0 All I wanted was a hearty breakfast.. the closest I could get was a croissant and a cafe au lait.\u00a0 Notre Dame is DEPRESSING!\u00a0 So yea\u00a0 there’s a hunchback in the tower, it so deserves one!\u00a0 St. Chappell was beautiful, I will admit that,\u00a0 and Versailles is WAY too big.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Oh and the Louvre.. OMG.\u00a0 Me and art, its like me and a Republican.. only in small doses please!\u00a0 And the Louvre is like the Republican National Convention!\u00a0 This is me at the Louvre… walking and walking….. painting, painting, statue, painting, statue… Oh Wow.. BENCH!\u00a0 Bliss.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Happily it was only 4 days in Paris and then it was off to The Netherlands.\u00a0 Such pretty money.\u00a0 And then off to Germany.\u00a0 The buildings were so NEW!\u00a0 (WWII joke here)\u00a0 And I almost LEAPED out of the car at one point when I saw a Burger King.\u00a0 I knew THERE I would KNOW I’d enjoy what I purchased.\u00a0\u00a0 Although I did enjoy an evening with my mother’s friend Welda.\u00a0 She and I talked brash sex and embarrassed the 21 year old accompanying us.\u00a0 That part was fun, hee hee!\u00a0 Then it was off to Austria (where I DIDN’T get to see the Lipizzaner Stallions.\u00a0 And finally to Switzerland, where I did pass Lego Headquarters.. they had Lego pieces the size of cars on the sides of the building!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Through all that, every time we went to a new country I had to re-price all the product we’d brought into that new money price.\u00a0 Me and math and the exchange rate with a calculator.\u00a0 (Remember 80’s…\u00a0 no Google!)\u00a0\u00a0 It was just hell.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

And sweet-buckets, those countries are SMALL.\u00a0\u00a0 As an American you get used to a country that takes 5 DAYS to cross by train, not 5 HOURS!\u00a0 I’d just be getting comfortable when the conductor would come around AGAIN and ask to see my passport.\u00a0 Which was incredibly annoying since my mother (dating a P.I. who’d filled her head with all the people who were “out to scam her”) made me wear this inside the shirt, under my armpit, zippered I.D. holder, where I had to keep\u00a0 my money, passport and anything else she deemed irreplaceable.
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She tells her friends.. I’ll never take another surly teenager on a trip to Europe again.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

I was 23!!! <\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

And have you tasted European deserts!\u00a0 They sooooo don’t believe in sugar!\u00a0 Cut me some slack, this sugaraholic was in withdrawal!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

So when others say… “Oooo, Paris” and express the desire to tour Europe I’m reminded of my experiences and I just grin.\u00a0 Because I know somewhere in those countries there are people who say, “Ooo America, I’ve always wanted to see Disneyland.”<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Been there… reminds me of the Louvre.
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In my life I’ve done a bit of traveling.\u00a0 When I was 5 and my brother was 3 & a half my mother had the opportunity to go to Sweden.\u00a0 I think she was even pregnant with my little sister … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1054","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-the-joy-of-family"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1054","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1054"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1054\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4463,"href":"https:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1054\/revisions\/4463"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1054"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1054"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.heatherbarton.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1054"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}