Like many young girls I dreamed of how wonderful it would be to have kids. Yes, yes, you can stop laughing now. I fantasized (I call it that because let’s face it there wasn’t a shred of reality to it) of sitting on steps watching my children romp, quietly, no less, and then sit at my feet so I could shed my knowledge on them.
I SAID you can stop laughing now!
Oh, I knew all about the messy aspect of babies and the torture of teens. And I was okay with the baby part. (Still waiting on the teen part!) Then they went to school and I was so happy they were gone for a few hours. Ahhhh, less noise/work/etc. But then they came home and they came home with homework.
At first the homework wasn’t difficult; it was getting the kids to do it that was difficult. Then my oldest hit fifth grade and he was assigned a new “project”, written and visual EVERY TWO WEEKS. That year I did my share of repeating the fifth grade. While at the same time repeating the third grade for the second time in two years; AND kindergarten for the fourth time in five years!
Half way through that year it fully dawned on me. I’m going to have to repeat all 12 grades … THREE TIMES!
Now the weeping didn’t begin immediately, because I had taken some steps to try and make this easier on the kids and therefore easier on me. This is the real reason for Parent/ Teacher conferences. My oldest is special needs and I always seem to have to tell the teacher to make sure these projects are worked on at school or the tools come home because I was getting “I don’t remember” as the answer to all my queries of “what’s this for?” between my son and I. By the end of 5th grade I’d pulled him out and now homeschool him.
But I still make it a point to meet with all three of my kids’ new teachers and prepare these poor individuals for what they are going to get. I’m never sure it helps, but sometimes if I don’t get to it, they’re flagging me down themselves to schedule it!
I tell all the teachers of my middle son that he is a minimalist and firmly believes that one sentence or word should be enough answer for YOU. He also gets easily distracted by noise around him so rarely finishes work because he cannot multi-task listening and working. Memorization baffles him. In other words, a normal boy.
I tell all teachers of my third son that while he looks like an exact copy of his father, inside… he’s all me, complete with attitude. He will do the work, when he wants to and will only get angry if you try to dictate his timetable. And watch that over-reactive temper of his. I pat them on the shoulder and wish them much luck in their teaching endeavor with a smile. Yes, I’m evil.
But helping my kids’ in school has brought out my own creativity. As self absorbed as I am, I remember having trouble with times tables and even addition facts and used tricks to help myself. My middle son has this problem also and I do find myself passing on to him my strategies for getting through school. Some days he accepts and/or gets it and some days not so much.
And I get lots of one-on-one time with each child when “the work is too hard!” Once again I have to get creative to help their closed little minds open up to solving their homework problems themselves with minimal suggestions.
They of course, just want me to give them the answers and frankly… sometimes, so do I.