You know you do this too!!
I wear too many hats.
And by hats I mean, split aspects of me pulled out for situations.
The Work Me, who runs a business in Lactation, usually working alone but when I go to a conference I’m surrounded by Earth Mother type females warped wrapped up in the glory of the good for the baby work they do. Very rarely can I be my true self. Instead, I’m a business woman, a fellow woman who breastfed her kids, etc.
The Mom Me, who is efficient & motherly & can’t use sexual innuendo in ANY conversation. lol. Who dresses nice but must not be TOO sexy now that the boys are entering teen years. As much as I love being a MILF, they may not like it! ha! Someone who must hide her creative outlet (blog) and her Facebook from kids & her friends who have friended their own kids.
The Daughter/Sister Me, who must curb, curb, curb her tongue as much as possible so as to not offend. Not that I care about offending, not really… I like shocking people. But my family is as tired of their reactions of judgment and disapproval and confusion as I am. Better to just be silent, reign in the woman who wants to entertain and peripherally participate in conversations. Even when they ask, I try to keep my usual replies to a sentence or two so as to not suddenly begin to monopolize the conversation.
The Friend Me, who tries to be there for her friends despite the fact most don’t think like me, don’t act like me, make different choices & decision than I would. Or they are distance-challenged, or time-challenged, or lets face it… we just don’t have as much tolerance for the real me, so I must tone it down a bit.
Then there is the Entertainer Me. Who is also the teacher in me, the narcissist in me, the genuine enjoyment of sharing me with others me. lol. That Hat is the most true ME of all my hats. I shine when I wear that Hat. I’m incredibly happy when I wear that Hat. I just want to roll all over that Hat like a cat with catnip. I want to wear it ALL the time… BE the HAT!
But I cannot. I must cover it with other hats when the situation demands it. And I truly hate to do it, cuz that hat rocks! But its necessary. For the kids, for the job, etc. Yet it isn’t forever. In about 6 years the kids will be old enough to see & understand the real Me. The boss will retire & take over what I’m doing for her business. At which time I’ll go get another secretary/office manager job hopefully in a law firm that won’t care so much about “proper” image or my sexuality.
I’ll condense my Hats to one. And those who do not like me always being the fullest Me I can be… well, you can make your choice as to how much time you want to spend with me. As my mother says (mostly about her sisters), “Just because they are family doesn’t mean I have to spend time with them.”
Works for me!