I’m one of the rare few women who squirt. Yes, its an actual thing. And no its not peeing. Trust me… Cuz I used to believe the exact same thing, until I did it myself. And then watched a Current TV special on it. They analyzed it and its definitely not urine. Hell, its one of the very reasons I ALWAYS pee before sex!
But I’ve posted on this particular susceptibility to the men who know HOW to make a woman squirt before. Trust me again… not every man can and not every man can on me who can on others. It’s truly a tricky thing involving a hard & fast finger on that special spot in the vagina that induces it. If I could teach it, I would.. but I think its a “practice thing” that might be best left to couples.
But one thing I’ve noticed about MYSELF is that I’m also susceptible to Urinary Tract Infections (UTI). I thought maybe it was only a summer thing. You know… it gets hot, I eat ice cream, I gain 5 lbs, my shorts fit too tight & BAM… UTI. But having JUST got over one last month, I could feel my body starting down that road again a few days ago. Last month when I felt the symptoms (peeing a lot & it burns when you pee…then the fever.. then feeling like you have to go and barely anything comes out & it hurts bad, then peeing blood, then not being able to control the urge to pee every 10 minutes.. horrid.) If you’ve had it to this stage you know how bad it is.. but if you’ve never had it.. watch for those first symptoms.
When my body starts down this road, I’m immediately wanting to get to a doctor to get my antibiotic so I’m not incapacitated by this. My brain is screaming.. “Be Efficient & take care of this!!” Cuz I gotta work & raise 3 kids, I can’t be down & chained to a toilet. But I’m uninsured. So last month, I hesitated & asked my friends if there was an over-the-counter remedy. I was given a lot of advice, but within 20 minutes of receiving it I was already peeing blood. Too far to risk the herbal choice. Down to Urgent Care I went & the cost was only $300. About a month’s premium of health insurance should I have had it.. so I felt I was ahead. lol
Then Monday I felt the symptoms again. And I got frustrated! I’ ha stopped eating ice cream, lost the 5 (ok.. 4! sheesh!) lbs & switched to the looser shorts. I shouldn’t be getting another UTI!! Aahhh.. but two things were different this time. One… my Saturday night lover made me squirt.. A LOT. And Two.. I caught it early enough to try the herbal remedy.
A note on the squirting… it’s both pleasurable and painful. It sucks as a lube since its the consistency of pee or water. It can soak your bed, dammit!!! (or your carpet.. depending on where its done.. [shackled to a doorway] Hey! Don’t judge me! His carpet, so who cares.) But, I think it uses the same “delivery system” as your urinary tract.. and it just might open you up to infections.
A note on the herbal remedy track…. OMG, I’m so surprised, but it worked. At my first, slightly strained, slightly painful pee.. I ran out & got cranberry pills. I knew to give up sugar for the day, but didn’t realize I also had to give up coffee until after I’d had a few sips.. Sigh. I spent the day downing a glass almost every 30 minutes & avoiding sugar. I took Aspirin/Motrin to stave off the low-grade fever & painful peeing and waited to see if this would work. Knowing I had Urgent Care up my sleeve if necessary. And it worked!! After 18 hours I felt 100%. Shocking. But saved me $300.00 and I feel great about NOT going down the antibiotic road. That shit fucks up my shit! Literally. Its why I’ve now added Probiotic pills to my cocktail, dammit.
So.. what we have learned:
We learned that herbal remedies actually do work. And…
We learned that if your lover is going to try to get you to squirt he should wash thoroughly.. like a surgeon (!)… up to his elbows.