It has been a really good year for me. I won’t go into ALL the details… read the past posts! Really, people… EFFORT.
That’s what the year has been with me and my kids. Me trying to pound the philosophy of EFFORT and them, and them staring back blankly. Although small/huge success with my oldest, who (FINALLY) uttered the words, “Well, it’s fixable, Mom.” to me when we were discussing what he managed NOT to get done on the list of Please Do School/Chores/Anything Instead of Video Games. That phrase is the key to him self-managing his high anxiety and depression (and I’ve been trying to get him to adopt/believe in it for years). If he keeps that in the forefront and follows up with action, I can stop worrying he won’t manage alone as an adult.
Sex God is mostly spending his time building a house in Palm Springs. It’s a great job and he’s loving construction. I think he’s finally found an industry that he can enjoy that will PAY him! lol It’s kind of like me discovering retail. I had the usual thought of “If I won the lottery I’d have $ to make my worries go away.” Then I realized… I’d not want to give up my Target job nor could I give up being my mother’s much needed personal secretary at Geddes. I giggled at the knowledge that all that money would do would pay off the bills and maybe buy a car or house but wouldn’t really change my life much. It might change my Ex’s as he’d not have to pay child support hahahaha!
With Sex God gone you’d think I’d have more time for my other lovers. Soooo not so, so busy. I did find time to meet a new Cub but only because he was cute, in shape, Poly and Bi. That is a rare combo in a younger man and I was intrigued. The first meet went pretty well. He showed up dressed to the nines in a suit! He had an adorable smile. He found me amazing (as he should, I am the Cougar fantasy…well, if you take away the Sugar Mama part heehee). But I noticed and he admitted when I told him about my oldest being an Appy kid, that he was Aspergers. When he was engaged with me, he was fully engaged and smiled his adorable smile showering me with compliments. But when he would half engage his face would change to what a normal person would interpret as completely un-engaged. Everybody half engages in conversation all the time, but we mask it with the “A huh’s” and nods, smiles and food toying, its a natural part of conversation we’ve learned that usually goes over the heads of Asperger’s people. This man would look away or look at you with a deadpan face. I found myself seriously contemplating if I needed another man like this in my life (my Ex was a little like this, my son’s are a little like this). But I gave him a play date just in case.
That play date was last week. He did a lot of right things and a lot of wrong things.
Right thing… he suggested we meet at his favorite bar instead of just “Hey, come over and we’ll fuck at my place”… in other words he chose to try and date me not JUST fuck me. That is a big plus in my book as I prefer FWB not NSA and when a lover tries for that, it preferences him for me (with the exception of Ultimate Man cuz… hot-bodied, gorgeous, former underwear models get a pass on that!).
Wrong thing… he picked a bar on the corner of Hollywood and Vine (close to him I get but….) with NO parking… dude… if you pick ANY place on a date and you’re not picking her up… YOU BETTER PICK A PLACE WITH PARKING… this it date etiquette 101 here.
Right thing…. perfect gentleman at the bar, helped me find street parking to his apartment, offered drink when we got there (water is fine, says I).
Wrong thing… found parking on the hill, wound down stairs, uneven street paving and then cobblestones in poorly lit areas in MY 3” HEEL BOOTS and did not hold my hand to help. He’s over 6 feet tall and didn’t really slow his gait to adjust to my slow careful (sure… call it sexy sauntering but I was in fear of a twisted ankle fall here!) pace.
Right thing… started with lots of clothes on kissing… slowly disrobed me then I demanded he disrobe himself… he spent a lot of time on cunnilingus.
Wrong thing… he spent A LOT of time on cunnilingus!!! If you’ve read past blogs you know this is pretty wasted on me. My clit is a mischievous bitch who moves and hides and does this “Oo that is great…. nope nothing…. ooo nice… aaaand it’s gone” thing. Hell, even I sometimes have trouble masturbating! And what fixes my clit issues… a nice cock in my pussy so she cannot hide away!
Right thing… he was properly appreciative when I went down on him, which I love (both the down and the appreciation) and he was even a little macho aggressive which is nice to see in a usually reserved Appy person.
Sad thing… he was not large in size… which isn’t always the end of the sex play for me… I’m adjustable! For the right personality. But when he put the condom on…. that lovely erection just wilted. And I’d worked to get it hard!
Crazy thing…. so after more foreplay to try again (and failing) and him wanting to get me off orally and me saying “I had some small orgasm, let’s just take care of you (so I can go home) he tells me of his philosophy not to ejaculate as it represents his life force.
AAAnnnnnd I’m out!
I’ve heard this bullshit before. Particularly from followers of Tantric Sex and the overly artistic (this man is a young Producer/Director of Indy films and an avid listener of PBS). And I’ve also listened to the medical studies which show it’s healthier to ejaculate than hold back. You’ve got to work your system, don’t let things build up… and the more sex you have the more sex you want. I KNOW what is truth… I experience it! The more sex you have the hornier you get… the more a man cums the more he CAN cum. If your orgasms are not Spectacular enough for you that you have to hold back FOREVER to get that one EXPLOSIVE one.. then don’t waste your time on me.
With a good cock in I can have orgasm after orgasm after orgasm. Want to make it spectacular? Bring in a toy, bring in lots of public PDA foreplay, bring in more than one person… hell, lets do it ALL! Want spectacular…. let me suck you till you cum… then get you hard again so you can cum all inside me!
There is a reason I call it Happy Juice and a lover who hoards it to “protect his artistic life force” well, that’s not a man I’m going to have the right things in common with, even with the shared Poly/Bi philosophy. Hell, Tongue God and I were very sexually compatible and he was/is a Tea Party Republican!!!
December, the season of giving… started off without a bang!
Luckily I called Bear and a Christmas miracle happened… we were free on the same day at the same hour. I scampered over there and got perfectly fucked with his thickly perfect cock. He gave me the usual mixed signals of NSA/FWB but as usual, I’m ok with it. After we both shared memes we loved about Bernie Sanders, I challenged him to FB me and he declined.. then later made an odd lead in statement of how a previous lover wanted to be his gf but he’s not the right man for her… then said, “Actually, better to say she’s not the girlfriend I want.” My instinct screamed to say, “Really, and who IS the girlfriend you want.” wanting him to say me but not wanting to hear him say not me.
After all that amusement my Sex God comes back from Palm Springs for a day and stops off at the sex toy shop. Mmmmmmm yumminess!
And I realize my holiday greeting should be
“Fun times and good orgasms for ALL, and to ALL a GOOD night!”